..
issue 41 posted at 11.00am on 21 September 2007...

{Insert Chelsea comment here}

Yours in sport

 

"Hhhhhmmmm" was the cry that boomed out of the Stade de France every time 'the anesthetist' got hold of the ball on Sunday night, as Chabal and co. showed the world that they may be back to their luminous best. One client bought the Try Minutes of the French front five (which included ‘Sea Bass’) at 63 for £30 in their second pool D game against Namibia. France stormed to an 87-10 win, scoring 13 tries in what was their biggest international win ever. More importantly for our punter Chabal and his fellow lock, Lionel Nallet, went over twice in the try-fest to bring the total Try Minutes for the front five to 175, which locked in a £3,360 profit on the night. The man with many nicknames had an eventful game, during which he was illegally taken out in the 19th minute by the Namibian number 8, who was red-carded. Although, the Frenchman made light of the challenge after the game by declaring: 'If I didn't have a beard, I would have got it right on the chin!'

It might not be the biggest win that we have ever included in the Good Trade section, but when you think of the amount of money won in such a short space of time, this trade is astonishing! One punter bought Yuvraj Singh's runs at 17 for £5 as he came into bat in Wednesday's meaningless World Twenty20 match against England. The left-hander came in after 16.4 overs with India at a fairly comfortable 155-3 and scored a modest 16 runs off his first six balls. Then he switched, looking down the wicket at poor Stuart Broad in the penultimate over and hit him for six, SIX TIMES in a row, scoring the fastest fifty in international history off just 12 balls! Our man could not have believed his eyes, as a simple buy at the end of the innings to try and nick a few quid ended up landing him a staggering 41 point profit – well done that man!

 

Oh dear, I'm not sure that there has ever been a more unpleasant bet than to have bought England's Kicking Metres in their now infamous game against South Africa. Call it misguided or just plain unfortunate, but a buy of the Kicking Metres at 105 for £20 could not have been pretty to watch. With the Farrell / Catt fly-half dream team in full flow, England produced the worst and most embarrassing international rugby performance for nearly a decade. The inept display was summed up by the inexplicable sight of second row Ben Kay opting to chip a kick when he could easily have passed to Sackey close to the line (which any resulting try would, of course, have given England the chance to kick at goal). Apart from a 13 minute drop-goal attempt by Catt nothing could save our man from losing 105 times his stake.

A bad week all round for Newcastle United with sponsor trouble, rumours of another injury crisis for Owen and a defeat to the Premiership 'whipping' boys. One client bought 200 shares in Northern Rock at 2.20p... no seriously, he actually bought the Geordies' Performance at 58 for £25 (25 pts win, 10 pts draw, 15 pts a goal, 10 pts clean sheet, 3pts corner, -5 pts yellow, -15 pts red) in the Monday night clash. Newcastle were kept well at bay by Derby, coming off a 6-0 hammering by Liverpool, as the Rams did just enough to secure victory through a Kenny Miller wonder strike. The Toon forced five corners but our man was cruelly stripped of those 15 points by Newcastle's indiscipline. Yellow cards shown to Smith, N'Zogbia and Butt ensured that the punter was on the ass end of a £1,450 loss.

 

Premiership Did Jose walk or did Roman's patience finally snap? Whatever happened, the Mourinho era at the Bridge is over. Pass the tissues round please. Chelsea are down three points to 33-36 on our Premiership Championship Index since the shocking news broke.

Who are the biggest movers on our Premiership Relegation Index this week? If you answered Derby (following their 1-0 win over the Toon) you'd be wrong. Steve Coppell's Reading are up four points to 11-14 after they slumped to their third successive league defeat last weekend.

Champions League Of the four English clubs who are plying their trade in Europe's top club competition, Man Utd made the biggest impression on our Champions League Outright Index. The Red Devils, who bagged maximum points against Sporting Lisbon on Wednesday, are up three points to 35-38.

Rugby World Cup Hallelujah! England's World Cup saviour four years ago, Jonny Wilkinson, is back in the fold (touch wood). Can he prevent the Red Rose from wilting any further? England Tournament Points are down 33 to 112-117 following the South Africa carnage.

NFL Washington haven't reached the Superbowl since 1991, but they've got off to a flyer this season (they're 2 and 0 and have already beaten their divisional rivals, Philly too). The Redskins are up nine points to 28-31 on our NFC East Index.

 

'It's good to talk' Send us your betting tales and you could be in line for a £100 football supremacy bet if your trade is good enough to be published. Whether it was delight at Doncaster or bananas at Barnsley, get them in to themole@sportingindex.com, the wittier the better.

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...avg Samoa tries in last
3 games v England

 
 


...avg Newcastle goals in
last 3 games v West Ham

 
 


...avg Scotland pts in last 2 matches v New Zealand

 
 


...no. South African tries
in last match v Tonga
 
 


...avg England pts in last
4 Internationals

 
 


...avg Quins pts in last 3
matches at The Stoop
 
 


...avg bookings pts in last 3 Newcastle v W Ham games
 
 


...mins since Chelsea
scored a League goal
 
 


...TGMs in last Cardiff v
Preston games
 
 


...mins since Man Utd
conceded a goal